By all means use sometimes to be alone. Salute thyself; see what thy soul doth wear.
Quote by George Herbert
Cloudless sky.
That was the 1st thing I noticed when I stepped out of the hospital after work today. It was sunny and bright as well, with the humidity level high. Ah! What a perfect day for a swim!
It was a quiet day at work, with only 3 cases for the entire day! Whoa oh! My trainer, Mr Par, was ready for me to take on cases all by myself. I handled a case of spine 'kyphoplasty' with him popping towards the end of the procedure only to check out how I was progressing. The other 2 cases were a 'Double J-stent insertion' and a knee xray, both done by Michael.
Yeah, it was so good. I popped into the staff lounge once in the morning before my case to read the newspaper and also after lunch in the afternoon. I read finish the whole set of papers today! And even read my own book which I settled down comfortably on the sofa and even fell asleep! :p Haha... Mr Par had to answer phonecalls from Mr Goh and the vendor regarding the Shimadzu machine. Mike went over to staff lounge to watch TV every now and then. There was practically no case at all in the afternoon. What bliss. Haha. I did not feel like I was working at all!
It was quite when I stepped out into the streets this morning to go for work. I bet many people have taken leave to enjoy this long week of holidays. I?m not surprised. This kind of holiday do not come by easily. Even the entire O.T was quieter, with not so many cases and many surgeons not coming in for the day. I hope Wednesday and Friday would be like this too! Anyway, I have to work tomorrow! Aiye. It will be counted in as overtime and I would be paid accordingly. From 8.30am - 3pm.
My swim today was not too bad, according to the timings I have clocked. But my body felt heavy. Probably it's because of the LSD (long slow distance) run I did yesterday from 5.45pm to 7.15pm. I have to start doing really long runs on weekends to prepare myself for the half marathon in another month?s time! And the swims weekly would be to ease off the tense muscles and relax them after stressing them so much on my runs.
I spent so much time in front of the computer yesterday afternoon that I did not think I could do a good long run. Although I did not work, which meant my legs were not tired out, but my body had not been mobile for the past few hours. I even felt lazy and very tired, clocking only 6.5 hours of sleep the previous. My mind was kind of in a whirl when I started my run yesterday.
When the mind is not willing, it's the hardest to get your body going. I started out slow and easy, not wanting to stress myself. I would aim to clock at least 1 hour 15 min. However, my mind wanted to focus on my run. My legs and body felt rather light. I told myself to not think of the mental fatigue and just run. My mind was not thinking of anything.
Eventually, after the 1st 30minutes or so, when I suddenly 'used' my mind to evaluate my run then, I did not feel the exhaustion that I felt when I just started. It's amazing. There have not been run events recently to motivate me to run. All the runs for the months of September, October and November are what's needed to prepare me for the half marathon. I got to beat my tired body after work at times to continue my regime.
I would tend to forget why I enjoyed running at times like this. I realized it yesterday once more. It's the solitude and peace I get. As Dad and Mum were at home for the past 2 days, which is a very rarity, the house seems too noisy and I miss the privacy I get when I'm home alone. From this, I found out that I can be a very comfortable person all by myself. In fact, I enjoy it. There is no one to bother me and no one to interrupt my thought processes.
Maybe I'm born to be a loner who loves company. What a paradox. I love human company, but I can survive loneliness well too. It?s a 'nurtured' thing? Or perhaps nature? I need my own private time and it's deemed to be very important to me, in terms of spiritual well-being. The next best thing would be to achieve this in the company of Nature.
Run.
Run away from home.
Run away from reality.
Run away from the responsibilities I have to shoulder.
Run away to Solitude.
Travel.
It's synonymous to running in that sense. I can assume another identity and disregard my 'life back home' on the roads. Ironically, I am actually living the 'real me' when I am traveling. It's not really an escape from myself, but from the mundane chores of daily life.
I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.
~Henry David Thoreau, 1854
Only in quiet waters do thing mirror themselves undistorted. Only in a quiet mind is adequate perception of the world.
~Hans Margolius